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Monday, January 4, 2010

Screaming in the Vacuum

1. I have been in a long term relationship..I love the guy but he's kind of mean to me. My family hates him but has only talked to him once or twice. I've cheated on him with 2 different men, multiple times...one guy was an old friend, another guy was someone I met online. I plan to NEVER tell my boyfriend about it. I kind of want to do it again.

2. I was molested by a sibling over 15 years ago but can't tell anyone. Nobody would believe me for my sibling is 'perfect' and I am already considered the 'bad guy'. My family considers me selfish, but I'm far from it. Despite the fact that nobody would believe me, I really wouldn't want to ruin my sibling's life. So I'll just stuff the hurt down like I have been for so long so my sibling can live happily ever after in their perfect little world.

3. I'm a really cool girl. I'm not one for bars, I'm open minded, accepting, and understanding of the craziest shit ever. I can keep secrets. I'm not into drama or gossip. ...I don't have many friends. I have many male friends but my boyfriend doesn't like me to really hang out or talk to them. The only male friend I'm allowed to talk to is one from my hometown; a junkie with no job, no aspirations. I have very few female friends. It's lonely but I think I'm okay with it because most female friends I've had usually end up being deceitful anyway. I haven't dated many guys because I'm always in long-term relationships, but I really think I could find a sweet man who would treat me nice but I cant leave my boyfriend...just can't.

4. I masturbate all of the time; so much that porn doesn't turn me on much anymore. Even the freakiest stuff doesn't work for me. I fantasize about having a 3some with 2 other men.

5. I had an eating disorder as a pre-teen. My mother didn't care. I still struggle with it.

4 comments:

  1. I am sorry, but I have had probably ENOUGH with caucasian (white) men having the hots and marrying asian (japanese, chinese, korean) women because they want to fuck a cute face every horny chance they got! And ALOT of these women AS WELL as men on personal sites ADMIT they rather lean to either asian or white. For the asian womens point of view, I honestly say its because they want to marry a live "ken" doll and have hapa kids and then some womens attitudes become VERY cocky to sassy because they feel they married UP! In my state, there has been a recent rise in internet crimes relating to asian men being busted. I would say its because of the asian men who simply CANNOT satisfy a greedy asian womans desire for white and vice versa. I have my rights to speak this way...I am asian, and I am having the worse time yet to marry my own....but you know what, I also think that caucasian women are very beautiful and gorgeous!

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  2. I am so confused as to where the Asian rant came from. I mean, fascinating, but what triggered this from the OP?

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  3. I know, right? I don't publish comments that are insulting to the people who post, but when I got this one I wasn't sure what to do... He's clearly upset and I've heard that Asian men get very frustrated about the commonality of Asian women marrying Caucasians (especially because Caucasian women often won't date Asian men), but I can't imagine what it has to do with this post.

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  4. I can understand the frustration, but it just seems totally random...unless of course he thinks he knows who wrote the OP?

    either way, it's like getting a bit of a 'bonus' secret.

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