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Today on Five Secrets: Semen vs. the Unitarian Church

1. I'm never happy with what I have, I always want what I HAD.
2. I would be straight if I wasn't completely disgusted with the thought of semen.
3. I want to be straight so I can go to church.
4. Even in fifty years, and I was in a happy relationship, and he came to my door and asked me to run away with him, I would leave it all in a heartbeat.
5. I pee in the shower.

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