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Better luck next time

1. I've posted on here before and no one knows. The first time it made me feel good and excited to tell people secrets.
2. I am miserable right now and probably be for a while. Yet I put on an I'm happy front.
3. I ended things with my bf, he cheats on me through inappropriate conversation with women and he had one and was seriously bad talking me. I had to let him go.
4. I still love my ex, he was my first everything and I miss him like crazy. I know I can eventually get over it and its not the end of the world. It's just so heart breaking. Why can't he just do the right thing? If he could we'd be unstoppable and could work through the babyish issues.
5. I need him, to hold me, make me laugh, comfort me, just be there. And I can't have that. It's killing me inside. I want to stop this all and go back on the break up, I just don't think he'll change....and that's no life to life(always question ones trust).
Extra: 6. Im thankful for the experiences I've had with him, but I want to be able to have them for life. I didn't want any of this to turn out this way....its just all so wrong. The one person who knows me, loves me, wants me, and knows how to be there for me I can't have, cause he's not good for me. I feel like apart of me is dying as the time passes. It's just so sad.

Gender: female
Sexual Orientation: straight

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