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Thursday, April 15, 2010

You probably couldn't get away with that.

I'm a pretty normal 21 yr old female, i think sometimes I'm only normal because of my fiance who i absolutely love and would die for but anyways....i was raped when i was 12. it was my mom's boyfriend and now i have a daughter in result of it. everyone knows, thats not the secret. the secret is that i blame my mom for not knowing something was up. sometimes i think of pushing her down a flight of stairs in her wheelchair but i do love her she is my mom

i hate my foster mom she is an evil person sometimes i think about different ways to kill her and get away with it like securing her to the front of my car and doing donuts till she is so dizzy she vomits then stabbing her with a fork until she loses so much blood she is ALMOST unconscious, then putting pepper spray in her eyes and leaving her to bleed to death and scalp her to have it as a trophy

i think about doing the same things to the man who raped me

i love my fiance we have an amazing relationship but i make excuses not to have sex with him because i gained a few pounds. i only weigh 170 but used to weigh 150. i know he doesn't care, he still tells me i'm the most beautiful woman ever but i don't think i am. i need to get back to what i used to weigh so i feel normal. i keep thinking i will gain more. i feel so bad for making up those excuses.

my sister makes me sick she is spoiled rotten by my mom. she is so direspectful to my mom. she has a bigger smile. she is taller. she has a closet full of clothes with tags on them from a year ago and won't let me borrow a tank. she is a f-ing brat. i think i have feelings of hate towards her because she looks more like my dad than i do and my dad passed away when we were younger. she pisses me off because she was so young when he passed that she was too young to know him and acts like so my dad i miss my dad....she didn't even really know him.
  
                  until next time...love the evil one ;*

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