Doesn't get cheaper than free

1.Every wednesday Me and my best friend measure our pubic hairs to see who has the longest one. We save the longest one in a jar.
2. I love breast Milk, everytime I see a pregnant woman I wanna suck her tit to get some milk
3. After I take a shit I save it and use it for fertilizer in my garden. It's cheaper than the stuff at the store
4. When I go out I sometimes dye and straighten my pussy hairs so the guys or girls like me at the bar.
5.I like to mix urine in my drinks. It tastes better. Somtimes I put it in my friends drinks.. But they don't know