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Saturday, June 12, 2010

Good advice

1. I love my girlfriend. I've had fantasies about her best friends and don't want her to know because I'm afraid the truth will hurt her.

2. We are engaged. My family(no wife or kids) doesn't know. I don't want them to disapprove of us getting married this early into the relationship. We've decided to elope and in a few years, put on a fake ceremony.

3. My girlfriend has multiple personalities. I love them all. Emotionally and physically. Certainly one way to get past polygamy laws and even better is each one is unique in bed. Like making love to a different girl whenever one is in the mood...

4. I have ten siblings. I have only met 2.

5. I'm sterile. My girlfriend(s) want(s) children. It just destroys me to know I won't be able to provide her with motherhood. She gets so motherly every time we're out and see a baby.

*BONUS*
I can't seem to figure out how most of the male population can have such a bad reputation in bed. I mean, is it seriously that confusing to the rest of us? Or do none of us practice foreplay on each of our women? Men, go get your gal and take her out for a romantic night. If it should come to bed, start slow and easy. Don't rush things. Give her some special attention. Use your hands and gently find the spot that makes her squirm. Focus on this spot until she climaxes once or twice. Now you can proceed with you in mind.

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