Don't you Ali Larter me!

i'm back with the rest of the story about my so called friend...

1...I'm actually not mad anymore, or i simply won't allow myself to BE mad, i cried tonight while watching the movie "Dear John" i cried mostly because i wish with all my might that i could stop loving this guy, then and only then i think this pain i feel in my heart will go away. this sick pain that i feel when i think of him. the reason i know that i love him so much, i do these excercises, i think of guys i've been with and guys i thought i loved and i concentrate on the feeling i feel in my heart and there's nothing it's empty and then i think about this guy and i feel this juicy sweet rush of pain and happiness pass through my insides and come to rest in my finger tips. 

2...that's why when i think of this girl now i think of her fawning over someone from my past and not my hunk of a guy. she's always saying to me how she wants to give him a makeover but i love him just the way he is, and he loves me too. he told my mom how he loves me but he's very cautious, he's afaid i'll break his heart.

3...this girl told me yesterday that she had a really nice dream, then he called me and told me that she told him she had a nice dream about him and her. when i asked her what her dream was about she told me that it was too R rated for me, so i got pissed at her and i told her she was pissing me off, then she gave me this long story about her finding true happiness and getting married and having a baby, and having hot steamy sex, i asked her with whom. knowing full well she was dreaming about him. so she ran and called him and told him i was pissed cause she didn't want to tell me about that dream. so she's denying that she dreamt about having sex with my guy although she said that in the dream, it was me, my guy, a gay guy and her. so who the hell would she have hot steamy sex with, it had better not be me.

4...She keeps saying she wants my guy for her husband and she wants to have his kid. i think the main reason this girl is acting this way is because my guy keep telling her that we're not together and he doesn't have a girlfriend, yet she was sleeping on the same bed with him and he wouldn't even so much as touch her, whenever she and i are in the same room with him she would open up her legs in from of him, show off her ass and pussy or breast. little does she know, he doesn't go for these things, he comes back and tells me that slutty behavior will never get him to sleep with her. yesterday she told him that i'm Ali Larter from Obsessed, can you believe her nerve? how the hell is that possible when you came and found me there with my guy? she tells him that i told her i really love him. all this should have been kept between me and her, it's a good thing he knows all that from me.

5...I guess she thinks that since i weigh over 300 lbs and she is nice and slim, (although she is always complaining about she's too fat) she maybe weighs 150 or so, so she thinks that he should choose her over me. but please! she and i have totally different values and morals, i'm not saying that i'm better than her but i conduct myself better than her. i don't use my body to get a guy, i use my inner beauty and kindness. what woman would ever scrape the dead skin off a guys feet...clean it and then massage them? especially when he's not her man? but these are the things i do for him. clean his finger nails and massage his hands when they're too rough because i want them to be smooth when he's passing them over my body. one time i scatched all the dandrof out of his hair then washed it for him. give him scalp massages and temple rubs where he would fall asleep sitting in my legs and i would just hold him there till he woke up. and these are the things i guess that got him to fall for me, i do them cause i love to not out of obligation.

Bonus...If he wasn't my best friend and knew all my secrets, he would be looking at me like a lier right now. i told this girl sometime ago that i was sleeping with a couple guys and he doesn't know that. and the bitch ran to my guy and told him that, i couldn't believe her. right now i see that nothing is confidential between us so i've stopped telling her things. i'm not hiding anything between me and the guy but what if i was? the fact that she thinks it's important to tell the guy everything i tell her scares the living shit outta me. 

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