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Tuesday, August 3, 2010

I wouldn't want to sleep either


- I'm currently talking to the guy of my dreams.  He says that he doesn't care about looks, but I'm scared that he's not going to want to continue trying to be my boyfriend if he sees me and realizes that I'm not as skinny as he imagined me to be.  I've never met anyone like him and I'm scared that he's not going to want me like he says he does.

- Sleep deprivation is my own way of inducing harm upon myself.

- I've witnessed a suicide right before my eyes and I remember it and dream about it every single night.

- I'm scared to tell anyone else that I love them...even my own family.

- Sometimes I wonder what life would be like for everyone else if my dad had killed me like he'd wanted to when I was 6.  He'd wrapped an electrical cord around my neck and was covering my mouth and nose so I couldn't breath, but the gardeners next door heard the struggle while they were watering our neighbors plants at the time and busted into my house and saved me.  I wonder if people would've even missed me if he'd killed me.

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