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Saturday, November 13, 2010

Hope it's not the one about Jon Stewart!

1) A lesbian couple I meet as a friend of a friend kind of thing asked me to have a threesome with them. They even offered to pay. I would have considered it (but probably not the pay, I'd feel odd about that) if I was attracted to them but they are both really obese (300lbs-ish each) and I'm not turned on by that. So I told them no but that I was flattered and hoped we can still be cool. I think we will.

2) I'm a really, really excellent liar and manipulator. I  have to really keep it in mind to use my powers for good and not evil or at least not on loved ones and people I actually respect and care for or I'd be a totally shitty person. But damn, I'm good. And if I had no realization it was shitty I would be great.

3) I'm in my 20's but I'm being gifted the gift of a breast aug by mi madre. I had a crappy childhood so I deserve something from the women who had me right? Besides her years of love, support, friendship and being a great mom...? Wrong. No, I totally don't but I ****WANT**** the double d chest candy so Mama is stepping in and generously giving it to me. Seem to contradict my previous secret. Manipulation, lies and all that. Don't worry...it doesn't. I told my mom essentially the exact same thing as I just wrote. I just want them so freaking bad and she is in the position to give. But technically this is still a secret, because I'm a fucking BRAT and she's never going to fess up to bankrolling my boobs. I'm lucking enough to be able to be an embarrassingly huge adult spoiled brat in this way.

4) I look like a bimbo / dumb blond but I'm an uber elitist liberal political geek. I tell everyone that the rally to restore sanity kinda sucked as it was sort of...pointless, misguided, poorly organized (?) and all that singing was just ughh and this is not untrue but I'd still fuck Jon Stewart.

5) I'm writing this with a huge smile on my face. I've masturbated to some of the secrets I've read here, I've cried over some of them and occasionally Ive gotten the giggles over them (in a good way). One of these secrets is a lie, can you guess which one?

Gender: female
Sexual Orientation: bisexual


[BOOOO! I just realized that adding the poll to the post was causing issues with the apps. For app users, at least on iDevices, trying to read the post resulted in being automatically routed to the poll without first getting to see the secrets. Drat! I have removed the poll for the time being. For those who are curious, with 68 votes in #1 and #4 were almost tied for being the false secret. However, keep in mind that a lot of people voting probably didn't read the post first :| For my part, I have NO IDEA. But I really do hope it's not the one about Jon Stewart. I feel the same way about him haha :) Expect to see more polls in the future, after I've had a chance to talk to my app developer about how to prevent these complications in the future. 
K]


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