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So close and yet so far

1) I love my best friend.  I really shouldn't.  I'm only 14, he's 18, he lives a thousand miles away.  He means so much to me.  If I ever told him, I know it'd just end up bad for me.  Every time in the past that I've told a guy that I like him, they end up leaving.

2) I told my best friend I'd tell him what my wish is when it comes true.  I probably will never be able to tell him, because he'll never love me.

3) I'm used to being told that I'm stupid.  It's gotten to the point that I believe it.  Even when my best friend tells me that I'm not, I find it hard to believe.

4) I could have walked a thousand miles to punch a girl in the face when she broke his heart.

5) I tell him that I love him every day.  He thinks I mean it as a friend.  I don't.  I mean it so much more than he believes.

Gender: female
Sexual Orientation: straight

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