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Forever virgin

1) when i was a kid (maybe around 6), i was sexually abused by my uncle. We didnt do it but he fingered me and he used to forcefully make out with me when we were alone together. He was obsessed with me and i was so scared of him.

2) when i got older i started to avoid him intentionally, but in public we act like were cool with each other. i think my grandma from my mother's side knew about what he was doing to me when i was younger but she kept asking him for help at home sometimes. That's why i hate both of their guts and im glad i now am living with my grandma at my dad's side. There i was loved and protected.

3) because of what happened to me when i was younger, instead of being afraid about just the thought of having sex, i got more curious to it. And so it didnt take a while when i lost my virginity when i was 14. I didnt tell anyone because i couldnt. That year was when  i did the most taboo things i have ever done. I regretted it so much but im glad it stopped.

4) at the age of 17 i had my first boyfriend and told him that i was still a virgin. At furst i was scared he would probaby find out that i wasnt anymore sooner or later.but when we did it and he put it in, the first time it hurt like hell, i saw it in his eyes that he was enjoying how he was fucking a virgin. Inside i smirked at his stupidity and plain ignorance. Oh babe i am so not innocent.

5) well it was just a few months ago when me and my first bf broke up. Of course at first i couldnt take the pain whatsoever but now im over it. and i just realized im glad i dont have to put up with him anymore because i gave him the best head he could ever get, and what he gives me bad sex in return? i didnt even felt the pleasure of my vagina getting eaten. I seriously think he's gay. Well goodluck to his life. And as for me, im debating whether i should fuck the upcoming boyfriends that i will have or keep my "virginity" for that one person that is really meant for me.

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