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Monday, July 12, 2010

Can't live with her, period.

I loved a woman for 6 years.

I tried to commit suicide 3xs because she hurt me.

She is trying to move on and I know it, but we can't let go of one another. Today she sent me emails from fb showing me that she was with another chick. And I am thinking about suicide again. I'm full of rage why can't she just take the military for a experience in life. I wish I can start all over with her to erase the bad that she and I both have done. She told me someone hacked her account but she lied to me so much I don't know if I should believe her. Right now I don't and i told her I did.

I am close to her family more then my own and when she send me to her parents house I found out that that was a way for her to cheat on me. So now when I go I still think she is cheating. Even when she knew the thinks that her stepdad tell me she still asked me to go there kuz she wanted this chick so bad!

I want out so bad but its like my heart won't let me. I'm tired! I'm hurt! She don't understand its either she change and try to make thinks right or leave me forever and let me attempt to be happy! Truth is I don't know if I would ever date a woman again.

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