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Pregnant women and stoners have a lot in common

*I'm pregnant but I'm not sure how long yet. I think its my fuckbuddy's. Cuz i think I'm only 4 or 5 weeks.  But my ex thinks it's his.

*I have no love for my ex. I have a son with him. But I have to spend the weekend with him.

*I crave chocolate pancakes. At 3am.

*I hate giving head. It makes me sick.

*I just want to lay around with him all day.

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