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A very bad engagement

1) I wemt to a bible college to learn more about relgion and now idk what i believe. it has made me doubt almost everything that i believed in at one point in time.

2) My number one fear is love i grew up without any and im afraid to find it for it to leave me as everything else that i loved growing up did (mom dad and so one)

3) i was engaged once and she cheated one me soo mant times she refused to have sex with me but would bang every other dude she knew

4) my past haunts me like its a cancer. it took me soo long to be able to fall asleep at my adopted parents home because i was used to drive bys and the cops being at my house every night of the week

5) i dream of dying almost all the time  i wonder who would miss me and who would show up to my funeral i wonder if i have made an impact on someones life or if i ever will... thats the only dream i have is to have a impact on someones life

Gender: male
Sexual Orientation: straight

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