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Friday, January 7, 2011

Keep hating on yourself & you'll never believe him

1. Whenever I'm sad, i listen to sad music to make me even more sad. Then I

cut. When I'm happy, I listen to happy music to try to keep me that way. When

that goes away, I cut. I CUT. I told you, you told the whole school. I lied

and said you lied. I wish somebody would be smart enough to know that i

lied.

2. I want to go anorexic, even though people say I'm skinny. They don't know

me. They don't know my struggles. Words hurt... Remember that.

3. I think I'm ungrateful. Once i get a wonderful boyfriend, i find a

problem and get upset. I wish i could just like a person for them self. I'm

working on it.

4. When he tells me he loves me, or that im beautiful, astonishing, amazing,

confident, pretty, skinny, perfect, and nice, I can never believe him. I

know that for somebody to think that, they should be committed- I'm ugly,

fat, far from perfect, and just a bad person. I can't help but think he's

lying... It kills me inside. I cannot believe him.

5. I can't even tell my best friend my secrets, in fear that she'll reject

me, tell my parents, tell her friends... I trust her. But i don't trust

myself.

Help.

Gender: female
Sexual Orientation: straight



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