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Haunted house hottie

1.) I smoke weed almost every single day.  My grades stay up, but my parents till don't have faith in me to keep it that way, and I've been smoking since seventh grade.
2.) I love sex. I can't ever get enough of it. I'm fifteen, but I don't hang out with anyone my age, and its made me a lot more sexually advanced. I've had sex with only two people in my whole life, but multiiiiple times. I'm talking to two different guys right now, and kinda considering just having casual sex with both of them. Its really not a big deal, but it still kinds nags at me for some reason. I don't want a relationship, I really just want someone to be there when I want to be intimate.
3.) I've submitted secrets recently, and this ties back to it. I'm 4'9". Almost perfect body. (Not to be concieted.) Girls tell me they wanna be me, and that I'm so pretty all the time. And I have guys constantly trying to hook up with me, a lot of them are even obsessive. but for some reason, I always, in the back of my head, feel like I'm not good enough for anyone. Like, no matter what I do, I'm just not good enough for the people around me.
4.) I feel like no one really knows me. They just see who I am on the outside, but they don't take the time to figure out who I really am. If I ask a guy - "Why do you like me? Besides thinking I'm hot or whatever." And they can't give me a straight answer. Ever.
5.) I work at a haunted house, and we have to keep the place clean, and we throw other events all year round. I feel like the people at the haunted house I work at are more family than the people I'm related to. They're the only people I even spend time with anymore, besides the people I smoke with. And my haunt family smokes too, so its not that often I'm not with them. I've boxed myself away, because I know that they're literally the only people in this world I can trust, and because of stuff in the past, I won't give anyone else the time of day to get close to

I wrote a lot, but can you give me advice?/:

Gender: female
Sexual Orientation: straight

[Every time I have a post from someone who asks for and gets advice, there is at least one submission soon thereafter describing similar problems and asking for advice, and this one is no exception. I would suggest looking at my response to "Fifteen sucked for me too," beginning with my third paragraph. Your desire for casual sex and pot are both more than likely means of escaping from a lack of self love or some other generalized unhappiness. Don't feel bad about that -- media and American culture as a whole are all but designed to make you feel that way -- but that doesn't mean you HAVE to. Love yourself, be truly happy.

If you already feel like you have an "almost perfect body," you're doing better than 80-90% of other women out there, including me. I used to be a licensed massage therapist, and I can't help but think of a client that I once had who told me during her pre-appointment evaluation that she was nervous because she didn't "have a pretty body." Ironically, she actually did have a beautiful curvy body that many women would envy, and it was sad to me that she felt so bad about it that she felt she needed to warn me. Most people DON'T have what magazines and movie stars would have us believe are pretty bodies. Be grateful and happy that you're one of a small minority of women whom society has not convinced that her beautiful body is hideous and stop worrying about it. As a wise band once told me, "Be positive and love your life." You've only got one.

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